Latest Addiction...

So i sing this song to all of my age
For these are the questions
We've got to face
For in this cycle that we call life
We are the ones who are next in line...

Have you guys been watching "Glee?"

Well, for the past couple of months, this TV Series has been a guilty pleasure on my part. For some, I know that the most common thing would be Chocolates but for me, just because I don't eat Chocolate, it's Glee.

I have been looking forward to watch the said series every week and couldn't seem to wait for all the coming episodes.

Maybe my addiction has something to do with...

Mark Salling a.k.a Noah Puckermann

Well, yeah admittedly, he is one of the reasons why I LOVE Glee!

But more than this hottie, I just love the idea of watching something that won't really make me think too hard. Not that I have a problem with grasping the nature of other series. I just wanna enjoy the activity in engaging myself into something so light & free from any intent to deceive or impress a televiewer like me.

Tonight, for sure I'll be glued to my monitor as I enjoy the 13th episode of my latest addition.

That's all...

Hey, it's been a while...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know that I haven't really posted anything for the past number of weeks. I have been so busy attending to so many things.

It's been an emotional rollercoaster ride as we (Me & my Friends) deal with the condition of "S."

I'm continuously hoping and praying that he gets well soon as in "super" soon.

At work, I have been bombarded with so many deadlines to meet right before the Holiday break. I haven't even done my Xmas shopping yet!

And also, I can't seem to get my mind off this colorful nike shoes called "Dunk." Mind you all, i'm not really a big fan of rubber shoes, running shoes, athletic shoes or just any other sport shoes that makes my feet look a lot bigger than they are. But this one is an exemption, I just love how they play with so many colors and how each color compliments each part of this footwear.

About 2 weeks ago, i attended the Bday bash of "V." It was super crazy and super fun night. One of those nights where I can just go crazy and relax.

Here's a sneak peek:

Left: "E"; Middle: "Moi"; Right: the bday gal, "V"

Pls, not him .... cont'd

Dear Lord,

You know my friend so much better than I do.
You know his sickness and the burden he carries.
You also know his heart.
Lord, I ask you to be with my friend now, working in his life.
Let your will be done in my friend's life.
If there is a sin that needs to be confessed and forgiven,
Lord, please help him to see his need and confess.
Lord, I pray for my friend because your Word says I should pray for his healing.
I believe you hear this earnest prayer from my heart
and that it is powerful because of your promise.
I have faith in you to heal my friend,
but I also trust in the plan you have for his life.
Lord, I don't always understand your ways,
and why my friend has to suffer, but I trust you.
I ask that you look with mercy and grace toward my friend.
Nourish his spirit and soul in this time of suffering
and comfort him with your presence.
Let my friend know you are there with him through this difficulty.
And may you be glorified in his life and also in mine.

Amen

Ilabit!

ailuvit!

It's not a new brand of Drug or Vitamin or any of those supplements that people take but it's definitely addictive. So beware, be cautious, be smart, be extra careful 'coz when it hits you... you'll surely be drowning from it.

Actual children’s answers to the question “what is love?”

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” - Billy, age 4

“Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.” - Karl, age 5

“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.” - Chrissy, age 6

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.” - Terri, age 4

“Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.” - Danny, age 7

“Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss.” - Emily, age 8

“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.” - Bobby, age 7

“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,” - Nikka, age 6

“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.” - Noelle, age 7

“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.” - Tommy, age 6

“During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.” - Cindy, age 8

“My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.” - Clare, age 6

“Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.” - Elaine, age 5

“Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Brad Pitt.” - Chris, age 7

“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.” - Mary Ann, age 4

“I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.” - Lauren, age 4

“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.” - Rebecca, age 8

“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” - Karen, age 7

“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” - Jessica, age 8

All Shades of Blue

Sunnies: Bazaar find, Jacket: Old Navy,

Button down longsleeves: Topman, Trousers: Defacto Jeans,

Tie: SM Department Store, Shoes: Gianfranco Ferre

Pls, not him...

I hated every second I spent with him during our last meeting!

Have you ever been in a situation where you actually hate being with someone you really care the most?

I had that kind of feeling when I went to visit one of my best buddy.

It all started when about 2 weeks ago, another friend texted me this... "S is sick and you should visit him."

It's been a while then since I last saw "S" and I don't think I was ready to go and see him. "S" and I had a petty argument about 2 months ago and since then I stopped texting him and visiting him. It was so weird 'coz on normal times, we usually see each other 5 days a week sometimes 7 days a week. After being bestfriends for almost 10 years now, we had our first fight. T'wasn't really a fight, just petty misunderstanding and because we both have egos, we somehow managed not being in touch for the longest time.

"S' is sick and you should visit him... If he needs to be visit then he would text me, that's what I said after receiving the SMS from our friend. If he wants me to visit him then he would've made an effort to lemme know it. But he didn't. I shrugged the message off. I have so much to do and visiting "S" is not even a part of it.

Another week passed by and the same friend texted me again... "S" is in the hospital right now and he's really sick.... I didn't pay attention. I was really hungry and I need to eat dinner.

After dinner, I started feeling a bit uneasy. It just suddenly hit me... I need to see my FRIEND. The 15mins ride seemed like forever. I was nervous, anxious, and so many other emotions are mixing up inside me. Then I finally got there at "S" place. He was already sleeping, time check: 08:30pm. I shook him up to wake him. He suddenly appeared from under his covers and BAM! My friend who looks so good 2 months ago now looks like a defeated soldier. He lost a lot of weight. He looks so weak. He looks hopeless.... It was heartbreaking looking at him. I had to excuse myself to ask for a glass of water pretending that I was really tired and I need to catch up my breath. It was the worst feeling ever seeing a friend in state of sickness.

"S" is the nicest person that any of you can ever meet. He has an innate motherly concern for people that he cares about. He is very pleasing. He protects his friends in the best possible way he can. He was never unavailable for any of his friends requests. He cries with you if you have a problem. He laughs with you even if nothing is funny. He is sensitive with your needs. He is what life is all about for most of us. He is not just a friend but a brother. He is that crisp sound of laughter. He is that one special dew on top of a leaf in the morning. He is everything to us, his friends.... And now, he looks defeated. Weak. Suffering. Ready to give up.

I don't mean to sound like I'd rather see other people suffer than see my own friend do so but I think I have a point when I say that there are other people who don't deserve the lives that they have 'coz there are people like "S" who are more deserving to live.

I don't wanna feel bad for my friend 'coz I know that he doesn't want us, his friends, to feel bad for him. I know and I believe that he's gonna be fine. He's gonna get well.

We won't just be behind him, we will be by his side, we will be around him, we will be his strength, we will be fighting with him and we know that he will win this battle. In battlefields, oftentimes the wounded is the victor. He will be definitely win this one and we will be there to celebrate his victory.

I love you "S" and I believe in you....

Oldies, Oldies and Oh So Goody!

I'm feelin' the old era's fashion vibe!

Any of you guys seen the movie "My One and Only?"

Well, It's about the life story of George Hamilton. Say who?.... George Hamilton, that guy that looks like a "Lechon Cebu".... Let's just say that the guys keeps a tan whole year round. Wait, not a tan, I just really dunno how to call it but anyways he looks roasted whole year round, that's for sure.

Anyhow, I saw the movie last night when I got home and I kinda like it. It stars Renee Zellweger as Georgieboy's Momma. It was set during the 40's or 50's (I'm not really sure...) and it tells how the guy was discovered. It features the hardship that George and his Brother and Mom had to go through after his Mom left his Dad. It wasn't really the movie that caught my interest, it's the fashion during that era that got in to me. Old Hollywood was without a doubt the best era for fashion. People dress up so well and so classy. Men and Women are both neatly dressed and the way they do it is so elegant. Yeah, that's the right word... It's purely ELEGANTË!

That's why I decided to do my own interpretation of the Old Era & here's what I came up with:

White Ruffled Top: Mint; Pants: Vintage Diesel; Tie: Rustan's;
Suspender: Vintage Chanel; Shoes: Zara

I just love what lovely Eds is wearing, it's a classic black number sent by her Mom. Here she is:

And one more thing, don't you just adore people with really nice taste when it comes to Shoes. I do own quite a number of footwears and I can't help but feel really good whenever I see people wearing a really nice shoes. I always believe that people who have really nice shoes are the ones who are great to befriend with.

Here's Eds shoes:

And here's V's shoes:

I Love It!

All pictures were taken during our "Yosi Break" ....

I salute!

I give you my honor, gratitude and respect...

Last night, I watched "The September Issue" and boy oh boy (Krissie is that you?), I so love that documentary/indie movie about the making of the yearly most awaited issue of Vogue Magazine. The said issue is normally the thickest issue of the year. It features the latest and must-see future designs from so many well-known Designers. As early as the first month of the year, people of Vogue would normally start the whole process of conceptualizing, buying, picking and planning of this special issue. As expected, "The Anna Wintour," has been her usual self the whole time. Very keen, meticulous, firm and she played the role so well , as "The most powerful woman of fashion in the U.S of A."...

But my heart and my respect goes to the one and only, the fiercest, the undeniably incomparable, GRACE CODDINGTON!

Nobody can deny the fact that her genius is totally unquestionable. Her creative artistry is simply magnificent. Her fashion insight is impeccable and undeniably over the top. She simply knows her craft and I truly believe that if there's one person who truly live and breathe fashion, she will be non other than Ms. Coddington.

In honor of my tribute to this fashion royalty, I decide to wear an outfit inspired by:

Here's my take on that:

White Top: www.izzue.com ; Camouflage Trousers: www.izzue.com ;
Belt: Mango ; Neck tie: Armando Carusso ;
Shoes: Calf-length Leather Converse ; Accessorries: ALDO

Meanwhile, my über fashion officemate/drinkingmate/dancingmate/crazymate "Eds" is also making a statement on her summer/fall outfit for today.

Here she is:

I so love that teeny-tiny cowboy hat that she has on!

So all ye peeps out there watch out for "The September Issue" & you will find out who's the real genius behind the glamorous and mega-trendy fashion magazine called "VOGUE."

Just got lucky....

JUST GOT LUCKY by: JoBoxers

You're the thing that ??? me weak
My heart knows of the beat I seek
And I found it (just got lucky)
Oh yes I found it (just got lucky)

I never worry that your love is fake
I'm feeling easy and I'm feeling ???
Cause I found it (just got lucky)
Before I found it (just got lucky)

And I never felt this way before
Like a dog always begging for more

I've been fooled by love so many times
I gave up on love and silly rhymes
Got my feelings always on my heart
Locked doors, the key was cut, it was a fake
Now I'm such a very lucky girl
Gang way, ????

(gotta hear me say) Got the answer and it's plain to see
(gotta hear me say) I'm for you and you're for me

I feel a quiver that I never miss
The sky's the limit with a friend like this
And I found it (just got lucky)
Together we found it (just got lucky)

And I never felt this way before
Like a dog always begging for more

I've been fooled by love so many times
I gave up on love and silly rhymes
Got my feelings always on my heart
Locked doors, the key was cut, it was a fake
Now I'm such a very lucky girl
Gang way, ????

Gotta hear me say
Gotta hear me say
Gotta hear me say
Just got lucky
Just got lucky....

Admittedly, I am an 80's baby... While my sister was sorting out her old clothes I found a cool pair of jeans that she has since the 80's. She was about to donate the said denim trousers but I insisted that she give it to me instead. Today, I'm wearing the jeans that reminds me of the good ol' 80's... I just love it! This jeans remind me so much about AGA MUHLACH! My sister and I would go ga-ga about him. It reminds me of those "nut-hugger shorts" that they used to wear during those days. Hahaha...

Eye Glasses: RayBan Wayfarer; Lifesaver Jacket: Old navy; Top: Burberry;
Neck tie: The Ramp, Belt: Armani Exchange; Shoes: Two Percent Homme;
Pants: My Sister's 80's Pants

Just wanna be full of sunshine today....

Oh color me love, color me blue, color me yellow for sunshine and dew...

I haven't been posting anything for quite sometime now. For some weird reason, I can't seem to extract any sensible juice of thoughts from my clogged brain. Anyhow, I just wanna share the perkiness of my outfit today... Top: Topman; Belt: Topman; Pants: Old Navy
Shoes: Zara; Bag: Marc by Marc Jacobs; Watch: Aldo
Bracelets: Bangkok Tiangge; Necktie: SM

I Know what you're thinking, YES! My work desk is kinda messy... Hello! Busy! hehehe

Drunker than a drunk monkey...

Camel bag: Anne Klein, Animal print bag: Nine West,

Button down longsleeves: Topman, Tie: SM Department Store,

Belt: Topman, Trousers: Old Navy,

Shoes: ZARA

Everythinng's gonna be alright!

Everythings's gonna be alright, it reminds me of a stanza in a Bob Marley song. I forgot the title though.

Didn't you notice that in every action we make, whether good or bad, we somehow hear people around us say, "Don't worry, everything's gonna be alright." It's kinda reassuring at times especially when you are in such bad situation.

I think, everyone of us have also said the same phrase one way or the other to make someone at peace. It is quite comforting in a way. It's one line you can tell someone when you don't know what else to say.

The past couple of days have been the most nerve-wracking days of my life.

I have been in a state where I could've lost someone who means the world to me, my Dad.

It was the worst feeling ever and I almost lose hope but because I know that there are so many people who are backing me up and continuously lifting my spirit, I didn't give in.

It's very uplifting when you know that there are people who actually cared. It's very overwhelming when without even asking for anything, good deeds just overflow your way.

EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT.

That same line that used be such a cliche is so powerful especially when you need reassurance and comfort.

I have heard the said line for so many times in the past and I thought that people say this because it's the safest phrase you can tell someone who's in trouble.

The past couple of days, the same line became my pillar of strength in order for me to keep my sanity. I didn't expect that this line can actually make me believe that it really is true, everything can be alright.

EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT.

It's the best way to tell someone that there's always hope. In every dark cloud, there lies a rainbow that gives us hope. That embraces of fears. That lifts our spirits. That makes us believe.

You people are my rainbow. You gave me hope. You kiss away my fears. You lift my spirit. You made me believe and for that THANK YOU.

Indeed, EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT.

Can't you just let it stop?

Can't you just let it stop?

That's all I'm asking for....
Waking up in the morning seeing someone you love suffering in not a simple matter. This is exactly what I have to deal with every day.

For quite sometime now, my Dad has been seriously sick. He's dealing with pain for a long time now. As a Family, we have been dealing with it together with him. Lemme tell you, it's not easy. We all need to stay strong for my father. It's not just him who's fighting this battle, we are fighting with him.

I, personally, can say that this is not just a simple battle because we don't even know how to fight it. But we are doing our best in any which way.

I have heard so much from so many people with regards to how to deal with it. We have tried so many ways. We need to find a good Doctor/Hospital... We need to get the right medicine.... We need to watch his diet... We need to be with him all the time... We need to pray... WE HAVE TRIED AND DONE ALL THAT!

How would you feel or deal with waking up everyday seeing SOMEONE you love suffering and giving up?

Yeah, my Dad is giving up now. We know that he's been struggling with this battle for quite sometime now. Like him, we are all tired now. My Dad is just tired now... And it kills us knowing that he is. He knows that we are with him, fighting with him. The worst part of it is, he's just the only who's getting all the blows. We can also feel the each gust but not as solid as he does. He is so beaten up that's why he's already giving up.

What will you do if you see your love one suffering each day?

No matter how much you wanna help him, it feels like you just don't have any power to do so. It kills me every time I see him tormented from so much pain. I have been praying so hard in order for me to get all the pain away from him. I'm young and stronger than him, I can deal with it. I have been praying so hard to spare my dad from all the suffering. I am... I truly am.

How would you feel when you know that you have given enough to help someone you love but nothing seems to matter?

Maybe what we thought as enough is not even half enough to help my Dad. Maybe the kind of enough we know is just less than what we should have been giving him. Maybe Enough is not just ENOUGH.

I want his pain to go. I want him to get well. I want to stop his misery. I want him to stay strong. I want him to live....

What/How will you feel if you see the end in the eyes of SOMEONE you love the most?

I don't wanna give up. I wanna continue to fight. I wanna be his strength. I wanna be tough for him.... I wanna HUG him, tell him I LOVE HIM, ask him not to give up... Pa, please for us... please...

But if his time is nearing its end, can it be just quick. Quick that he won't feel anything. His pain is just too much and it's not fair to prolong his agony. Just make it quick. Don't let him suffer anymore... You can just let it stop. Please just let it stop....

And it happened again....

And it happened all over again!

Have you ever been so drunk that the next day you couldn't even remember even a snippet of what transpired the previous night?
Well, that does happen to me all the time!

It all started when our whole department decided to grab a drink after work. Because it was payday that day, everybody became so ecstatic about "chillaxing" that night.

We all walked going to the nearest joint where there's an available ice-cold-beer.A couple of beers has turned into a few glasses of weng-weng.

Conversations started to flow, from politics to religion, serious to silly stuff, work and play, girlfriend and boyfriend, sex and sex, gay or straight and so much more.

Some of us called it a night but me and my posse was just about to start!

More money, more booze, I need to party, can somebody get me some cig?, I wanna hook up, "cute boys, here we come," where's the cab?, how do we get there?.... LETS GO!

There we saw ourselves getting in this new establishment...
SO, what are we having???Ok, lets settle for this....
And so, the drinking started...

Nice crowd, Nice music, Nice booze, Nice drinking partners...

I started dancing after i half emptied my glass... I dunno about you but i can't seem to help it when I'm already tipsy and the music is banging, I just need to DANCE!

Yeah! Tugz, tugz, tugz.... The base is hitting me like waves and it feels really good.

I need more drink and I need to smoke...

Then after that, __________?

I already don't know....

Come next day, I found myself sprawled in my bed with a big bangin' hangover.

F*ck, my head hurts like hell and my throat just aches... I need water... lots of water...

WAIT!!!

How the hell did I get home? Where's my bag? My money? Who brought me home? Is it "V"? I don't think so, she lives on the other part of the Metro. Is it "E"? No, I don't think so! She doesn't even know where I live. Is it "R"? Where the hell is "R" last night? For some reason I can't seem to remember his presence last night.

Ok, my bag is here, my money isn't, my mobile is here, my shoes, my pants, all my stuff are here! But HOW DID I GET HERE? I need to ask one of them how i got home. But wait, this is like a dejavu. All of this has happened already. It's like a dream... I'm definitely dreaming. I was drinking, dancing, flirting, having fun, and then, ________?

How can I be dreaming if I just woke up? If this is just a dream then how come my head hurts so bad?

A few months, weeks, days ago, I have been in the same situation like this and I also can't remember anything. Was I also dreaming that time when it happened?

Then suddenly, I heard, "NO! You freakin' sonafagun!".... Is that an angel talking to me? Did something really bad happened to me last night and now an angel is talking to me?

"Get your ass off the bed and we need to talk!"

No, that's not a voice of an angel!

But it does really sound familiar.

OMFG! It's my MOM! And she's fuming mad!

Hahahaha....

Indeed, it wasn't an angel who I heard earlier that day. It was my Mom and she told me that I was so drunk and shouting outside our gate. She even told me that I woke up some of our neighbors. I think that it's an exaggeration of course. Me, waking up some neighbors by just screaming outside the gate? i don't think so!

Another weekend have passed and i say that I have finally got the rest that I have been needing so bad. Another day at work and somehow I feel like i still wanted to go back to slumber and rest till it's weekend again but I CANNOT! As i stepped inside the office, I saw "E" but I didn't have the guts to ask her what happened that weekend. I somehow feel that I did something wrong and I'm not ready for the embarrassment. Hehehe... But tell me, how do you manage to get over something embarrassing that you don't even know in the first place? Well, I"ll just wait for them to confront me.

"Toot Toot!"

There goes my mobile, who could this be? An early message from "V"... Hmmm, what does she need this time... then...
"Walang-hiya ka! Mag-uusap pa tayo ha!"
Oh my! Did i really do something awful that night?
Oh my! this is the end of me!

Lunchtime:

"V" finally came in, late of course! As she approached me, my heart starts beating really fast out of nervousness.
"So what did I do last weekend?" I asked.
"Where did you go that night?", "You left us!", "It doesn't matter coz I also left after I got out of the restroom... hehehe" She said.
"What the hell happened to us?" in unison we asked each other then we started laughing.

I do remember a bit during that time. We were having a blast. We were dancing and just having fun. We were drowning ourselves with Vodka. Tis really funny that sometimes you just won't remember a thing when you're having so much fun. For sure, we will have more of this and at the end, we will all laugh and tell ourselves that we are indeed crazy!

I just wanna scream!!!

I just wanna pull my hair off my head, run naked and scream till i pass out!

That's how I actually feel right now....



Well, the reason why I feel that way as of this moment is because of the project that I'm working on these past few days.

Have you ever tried calling people and request a meeting?

Me, that's what I do everyday!

First, you have to deal with telephone operators who takes so long to answer calls or chances are you'll come across a recorded voice prompt that would be so irritating to listen to.

Second, your call would land in some department that isn't even the right department that you are looking for.

Third, some bore employee will pick up your call and transfer you to the right person that you are calling or if it's your lucky day, He, She, It, will ask you to call again.

Forth, after going thru with all the hassle (1-3), the secretary of the person that you're looking for will just tell you to call again coz her boss is in a meeting, talking with someone, out, on leave or worst, "just send us a proposal."



How come it's so damn hard to find people when you need them the most? But when those same people are trying to look for you, it's so easy to find you?

It's like asking a Politicians/Government Officers for help. When you need to ask help from them it's so hard to find them. You have to go through so many people and more just to find them and when you already did, it's gonna be doubly hard to request for a meeting with them or they would be too busy to accommodate you and you will be asked to just deal with the 1st person you spoke with before you actually met his presence.

How come it's so effin' easy for them to manipulate the general masses to vote for them and yet they couldn't even spare their two cents with you?

In a few months, its gonna be election again and for those of you out there who are voting, pls. be wiser this time. Lets not claim to be a wise voter when we are really not.

Lets not vote based on the popularity of some political figure.

Lets not vote for future promises coz what's important is now.

Lets not vote because this person would look good on our monetary bill.

Lets not vote for more flyovers, basketball courts, sidewalks, highways, Xmas lanterns, chicken wires, newly painted buildings, monuments, grand cityhalls, business trips, lavish dinners, ets.

Lets vote for somebody who has a consciences. Lets vote for somebody who will be willing to listen.

Lets vote for somebody who will not just enriched himself but who will enriched the whole Republic. Lets vote for somebody who really cares.

Oh well, it's really hard when you can't seem to control all the thoughts inside your head. Silly stuff such as this just keeps coming. To think that it just all started with my foolish rantings about work and setting up meetings.

Whateves, for whatever it is, lets just all work to make our future so bright it can blind us. Hehehe...

San Mig Light...

One cold San Mig Light pls....

It's Friday again, the last working day of the week. I'm pretty excited as to whats instore for me after office hours. Normally on a Friday night, me and my friends would surely find a way to get drunk and crazy. But that was a few years back...

Funny that when you really think about it, it's really an insane thing to spend some much effort on dressing up, getting drunk and keeping yourself stand straight the whole night when all you wanna do is have fun with all these people that are just as crazy as you are. Well, that was us back then.

Suddenly, from being a whole group, we started drifting apart as an individual ( in a better way though). We all started getting our so-called niche in life. Nobody among us have ever thought that we will be in wherever we are now. I'm not saying that we are all accomplished respectively but where we are now is so much better than where we used to be. Life for us before was so much simpler, a lot of fun, full of laughter and totally crazy. Today, we all have responsibilities, problems and so many other things to face. I, personally, think that if given a chance to choose between my life now and my life before, I would grab the chance to settle for the latter. If only life gets simpler as time goes by but no, it doesn't infact, I really think (know) that life gets harder and harder each day.

Where do you wanna go? What are you gonna wear? Where do you wanna meet? What are you drinking? What time are we going home or are we still going home? Hahahaha... All these questions are part of my yesterday. It definitely brings a smile. Place to go to? Clothes to wear? Meeting place? Choice of drink? Going home early or still going elsewhere? These are the only problems from my yesterday. Wish that its all just the same.

Oh well, being nostalgic is not the way that I should spend my Friday, that's for sure. Tonight, I'll just be staying home. Not literally though coz I'll be at a friend's pad. We are both looking forward spending our Friday night watching movies. I know that this is way tooooo simple from what we used to do but we're not complaining. Just a relaxing night with a friend who I have been with since my crazy yesterdays till my simple todays. Just me, her, old movies, chips, pillows, comforter and a cold SAN MIG LIGHT...

"Magsimba ka kasi..."

"Magsimba ka kasi..."

That's the usual line that i get from telling people about my dilemna these days...

About a year ago, my dad was diagnose of kidney failure. It's one of those diseases that occur from an acute situation or chronic problems. T'was really hard for us (family) to deal with it coz we know that it needs a lot of medication and financial support.

My dad has been in and out of the hospital since then. Every other week would be an exaggeration but it's true. We are starting to run out of monetary funding's for the hospitalization and that makes it a lot harder.

Just recently, i convinced my Mom to have a general check up coz we wanna make sure that she's in tip top shape and of course we wanna avoid such illness that might lead us to more stuff like what my dad is going thru. After her mammogram, the doctor told us that there's a big mass inside her left breast. WHAM BAM! that was a sure hitter! She was advised to get a biopsy in order to find out the real deal about that thingy inside her. After few days we got the result of her test and another BIG BANG just hit us unexpectedly. She needs to undergo an operation in order to chop off her left breast coz the fist sized mass inside her is cancerous.

How would you exactly feel if both of your parents are undergoing a certain problem such as this one? Me, admittedly, it's like a big blow on my chest. Such blow that leaves you emotionless. I wanted to cry but for some odd reason, tears just won't flow out of my eyes. I wanted to scream but there seemed to be nothing to scream about. I wanted to go ballistic but I just can't. It's like there's this overwhelming power inside me that just won't go out and it's totally driving me mad.

I started telling my friends about it but of course as expected, they just listened to me and told me "kaya mo yan" after. I also my workmates and they said "why don't you pray?"... It's not that I don't pray but my point is out of all the billions or maybe trillions of people who are praying at the same time with me asking for help or whatnot, what are the chances that I will be heard?

Then, in unison, people started telling me "Magsimba ka kasi..." Will it surely help if I go to church? And if I do so, is there any chance that I can be heard and attend to at once for my request? If prayer can heal, how come so many are dying every second of the day? And if I do pray, how long do I have to wait before I can get an answer?

Why does things like this has to happen? For sure, I'll be getting "There's a purpose in all your trials" as an answer. Ok, granted that it has a purpose, then what is it? When do I know the reason behind this? When i don't need to know anymore? When it's already late?

"Magsimba ka kasi..." - will this truly help?