Have you ever been in a situation where you actually hate being with someone you really care the most?
I had that kind of feeling when I went to visit one of my best buddy.
It all started when about 2 weeks ago, another friend texted me this... "S is sick and you should visit him."
It's been a while then since I last saw "S" and I don't think I was ready to go and see him. "S" and I had a petty argument about 2 months ago and since then I stopped texting him and visiting him. It was so weird 'coz on normal times, we usually see each other 5 days a week sometimes 7 days a week. After being bestfriends for almost 10 years now, we had our first fight. T'wasn't really a fight, just petty misunderstanding and because we both have egos, we somehow managed not being in touch for the longest time.
"S' is sick and you should visit him... If he needs to be visit then he would text me, that's what I said after receiving the SMS from our friend. If he wants me to visit him then he would've made an effort to lemme know it. But he didn't. I shrugged the message off. I have so much to do and visiting "S" is not even a part of it.
Another week passed by and the same friend texted me again... "S" is in the hospital right now and he's really sick.... I didn't pay attention. I was really hungry and I need to eat dinner.
After dinner, I started feeling a bit uneasy. It just suddenly hit me... I need to see my FRIEND. The 15mins ride seemed like forever. I was nervous, anxious, and so many other emotions are mixing up inside me. Then I finally got there at "S" place. He was already sleeping, time check: 08:30pm. I shook him up to wake him. He suddenly appeared from under his covers and BAM! My friend who looks so good 2 months ago now looks like a defeated soldier. He lost a lot of weight. He looks so weak. He looks hopeless.... It was heartbreaking looking at him. I had to excuse myself to ask for a glass of water pretending that I was really tired and I need to catch up my breath. It was the worst feeling ever seeing a friend in state of sickness.
"S" is the nicest person that any of you can ever meet. He has an innate motherly concern for people that he cares about. He is very pleasing. He protects his friends in the best possible way he can. He was never unavailable for any of his friends requests. He cries with you if you have a problem. He laughs with you even if nothing is funny. He is sensitive with your needs. He is what life is all about for most of us. He is not just a friend but a brother. He is that crisp sound of laughter. He is that one special dew on top of a leaf in the morning. He is everything to us, his friends.... And now, he looks defeated. Weak. Suffering. Ready to give up.
I don't mean to sound like I'd rather see other people suffer than see my own friend do so but I think I have a point when I say that there are other people who don't deserve the lives that they have 'coz there are people like "S" who are more deserving to live.
I don't wanna feel bad for my friend 'coz I know that he doesn't want us, his friends, to feel bad for him. I know and I believe that he's gonna be fine. He's gonna get well.
We won't just be behind him, we will be by his side, we will be around him, we will be his strength, we will be fighting with him and we know that he will win this battle. In battlefields, oftentimes the wounded is the victor. He will be definitely win this one and we will be there to celebrate his victory.
I love you "S" and I believe in you....
I had that kind of feeling when I went to visit one of my best buddy.
It all started when about 2 weeks ago, another friend texted me this... "S is sick and you should visit him."
It's been a while then since I last saw "S" and I don't think I was ready to go and see him. "S" and I had a petty argument about 2 months ago and since then I stopped texting him and visiting him. It was so weird 'coz on normal times, we usually see each other 5 days a week sometimes 7 days a week. After being bestfriends for almost 10 years now, we had our first fight. T'wasn't really a fight, just petty misunderstanding and because we both have egos, we somehow managed not being in touch for the longest time.
"S' is sick and you should visit him... If he needs to be visit then he would text me, that's what I said after receiving the SMS from our friend. If he wants me to visit him then he would've made an effort to lemme know it. But he didn't. I shrugged the message off. I have so much to do and visiting "S" is not even a part of it.
Another week passed by and the same friend texted me again... "S" is in the hospital right now and he's really sick.... I didn't pay attention. I was really hungry and I need to eat dinner.
After dinner, I started feeling a bit uneasy. It just suddenly hit me... I need to see my FRIEND. The 15mins ride seemed like forever. I was nervous, anxious, and so many other emotions are mixing up inside me. Then I finally got there at "S" place. He was already sleeping, time check: 08:30pm. I shook him up to wake him. He suddenly appeared from under his covers and BAM! My friend who looks so good 2 months ago now looks like a defeated soldier. He lost a lot of weight. He looks so weak. He looks hopeless.... It was heartbreaking looking at him. I had to excuse myself to ask for a glass of water pretending that I was really tired and I need to catch up my breath. It was the worst feeling ever seeing a friend in state of sickness.
"S" is the nicest person that any of you can ever meet. He has an innate motherly concern for people that he cares about. He is very pleasing. He protects his friends in the best possible way he can. He was never unavailable for any of his friends requests. He cries with you if you have a problem. He laughs with you even if nothing is funny. He is sensitive with your needs. He is what life is all about for most of us. He is not just a friend but a brother. He is that crisp sound of laughter. He is that one special dew on top of a leaf in the morning. He is everything to us, his friends.... And now, he looks defeated. Weak. Suffering. Ready to give up.
I don't mean to sound like I'd rather see other people suffer than see my own friend do so but I think I have a point when I say that there are other people who don't deserve the lives that they have 'coz there are people like "S" who are more deserving to live.
I don't wanna feel bad for my friend 'coz I know that he doesn't want us, his friends, to feel bad for him. I know and I believe that he's gonna be fine. He's gonna get well.
We won't just be behind him, we will be by his side, we will be around him, we will be his strength, we will be fighting with him and we know that he will win this battle. In battlefields, oftentimes the wounded is the victor. He will be definitely win this one and we will be there to celebrate his victory.
I love you "S" and I believe in you....
No comments:
Post a Comment